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| Thank you Jebus for The Cure. When you want to feed your funk you can count on them to come up with some nice depressing and yet enjoyable tunes. It's got a beat and you can dance to it. Maybe. Anyway, I just DL'd a new album and there are some great tunes on there, especially for breakup mode funk. For today's active dumper* or dumpee** I highly recommend giving The Cure's The Cure album a listen.
Lyrics: *, **
Clicky, clicky. (You owe me, Eggo) | | |
| So I take my car in today for regular maintenance... lube, oil, filter basically. I also wanted to replace my temporary exhaust hanger with something a little sturdier than the coat hanger I had been using. In hindsight, the hanger probably would have been my better option. The lube job was only like $30, but the labour and parts for the muffler were $100. That's an expensive coat hanger replacement.
Not only was it a rip-off, but the guy behind the counter seems to recognize me. He looks very familiar to me as well, but I can't place the face. And then it comes to me... he was at the bar last Saturday for Jeff's birthday bash.
Flashback to a week ago. Jeff's little sister Sarah gives me a call to invite me to Jeff's surprise birthday party. Thankfully that exactly what I wanted to do - get the hell out of the house, act and drink irresponsibly, get down with the old posse. Mind you, half of the old posse brought along their significant others, but whatever. A good time was had by all. Especially by the singletons among our group who didn't have a sober better half to remind us not to make fools of ourselves.
As the evening progressed we were getting pretty rowdy and inconspicuous and had absorbed a few well-wishers into the group. Jeffy was packing bowls behind the bar while said well-wishers (moochers) looked on. Anyway, there was some trouble between some of the newcomers which resulted in some serious weed spillage which seemed to piss a lot of people off. Go figure. So I'm trying to shelter Chris from the seething masses while he gathers up what weed he can salvage when I literally get dragged into the tussle. Anyway, nothing happened... a few punches were thrown, a few feelings were hurt, but everything settled down fairly quickly. Good thing too, because some up tight hard-ass comes out of the back of the bar and starts chastising us.
This is the guy at the garage. Last week's indiscretions flash through my mind as I stare at him trying to discern any look of recognition on his face. Of course, I can't be sure, but I don't think he connected the two events. Not that it really matters, but I really don't want the guy billing me for parts and labour to revert to hard-ass mode. Especially considering he could throw a 340 KDJ fuel inertia decomfibulation pack on the bill and I'd be the last to cry foul.
Damn, those decomfibulators are expensive.
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| Kudos to Ali on her excellent job of sleuthing. She's more talented than Nancy Drew in a clusterfuck with the Hardy boys and Encyclopaedia Brown. Sadly, unlike her slutty sleuthing doppelganger, Ali wasn't able to come to the right conclusions. Get it? Come? I crack me up. Actually it's the image of Nancy Drew in a four way with Encyclopaedia Brown and those puffs, the Hardy boys, which really gets me laughing. Anyway, it's true that she's getting 13 or more hits on her site a day and they likely are down to me.
Obsess much? No. I'm sure it would give her much joy to think of me staring blankly at the computer screen waiting anxiously for her next scathing blog entry, but it simply isn't the case. I believe that when I 'refresh all' in my browser, her page and every other page I have open gets reloaded, thus recording a hit on her site meter. However, her presumption that I am obsessed with her is unfounded. If she only had the meter thing installed before we broke up, she would see that there hasn't been any influx in the number of times I reload her page. And that was back when I was a disinterested asshole, but before I was a liar.
Hadn't you heard? I am a liar, a jerk, an asshole, a pussy, a stalker, among other things. I was waiting until the 'seething anger' Ali was suffering from subsided before trying to contact her and engage in rational discussion. It's taking a little longer than the couple of days I had anticipated, and in the meantime I’ve suffered her virtual name calling good naturedly. The side she presents of this tragic story is even humorous at times for being so skewed. She's fair and balanced like a Fox news broadcast. But don't take my word for it! After all, I am a liar, a jerk, an asshole, a pussy, a stalker, among other things.
Since I am here though, I'll just say a few things from the other side of the story. Don't worry, it's not a defence argument - I am sure Ali and her friends have written me off with all other men as a prick.
Most expensive break up - apparently, I made her buy a gift and bus pass with my untapped power of telepathy. If I work real hard and hone my skills maybe next time I can score a pony. A pony to sacrifice. Yup, I'm that evil. Oh, I also made her book a bowling night all for me. Oh wait... didn't she ask me for suggestions for her singles club to do? Oh yeah... and by answering her request with a perfectly valid suggestion, the financial responsibility for the failure of said outing should be borne solely by me. Seems reasonable.
He dumped me for a video game - simply wrong. My comment that essentially I'd rather be playing a new game to spending the day with her only added to the feelings of neglect that she'd been feeling for some time, and highlighted the apathy I felt toward the relationship. The game incident was a symptom of a problem that already existed but had not been addressed by either of us. So please stop slandering the good name of what is quite possibly the best video game of all time; Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas! WOOOO
He's such a liar - uh-huh. This one really confounds me. Her friend tells her I'm a jerk for lying to her and stringing her along for too long, and I should have ended it when I realized it wasn't working (which is precisely what I did. Her letter asking me what my intentions were and where my priorities lay forced me to consider our relationship in a manner I had not before causing me to realize my heart was not in it, hence break-up-time). And yet her comment to me was that I should have strung her along longer - at least until her birthday and Christmas had passed. Gee - I'd like that, but wouldn't that make me a liar?
He ended a good thing so badly - Can you think of a better way? Seriously. What better way could I have ended it? I can think of a plethora of worse ways. Cruel, evil ways that befit her depiction of my true nature.
Those things aside, I can just say that I hope Ali feels better about the whole situation soon so that we may once again talk as friends and reminisce about the good ol' days. Hey... it could happen!
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| Well, it HAS been a while since I posted! Oh well. I'm not apologizing for it any more. I'll just lie and say it's a case of quality, not quantity. This post isn't going to be very long at all. What's been happening? Not a whole lot that I want to get into here and now. My grandma is in the hospital. Don't feel sorry for her. I know that sounds cruel, but she put herself there by participating in team sports with a bunch of grade schoolers. Yup. That's my gran. So she's going to be ok eventually, but has to go into rehab for a while as she fractured her pelvis.
That's about it for what's been happening. What inspired me to write today however is something very trivial, yet very funny. At least, it is to me. If you are reading this blog, then you likely know I work at a real estate office. You also probably know I live in the stix. In a 'burb of a 'burb. It's not the end of the world, but you can see it from my window. Anyway, this small town has a quaint main street like any quaint main street you've ever seen. Barber shop, bank, local no-name clothing boutiques, hotel, century buildings - all of them. Oh, did I menation the hotel has been the local strip club for as long as I can remember? Very quaint. Anyway, this famed landmark recently dimmed it's neon lights and removed the girls!girls!girls! from it's premises. Yes, as you have probably guessed, there was much sadness across the land. Where would the local folk go to see over the hill strippers shake their high mileage bosoms to the lyrical sounds of AC/DC? I tell you, I was - Thunderstruck. Not because I was a patron, and not because I am sad to see it go, but because it has always been there. It is a landmark. The name 'Castle' is synonomous to me with boyhhood jokes, and teenage jokes, and even until recently the place was... well.. a huge joke. But a landmark nonetheless.
Anyway, back to the point. Point? Oh right. I just realized that one of the agents in our office is responsible for the sale of 'the hotel'. Nice of them to conveniently forget it's sordid past so quickly. I just thought this was amusing and am looking forward to finding out all the juciy behind-the-scenes details of such a remarkable building. Heck.. I think it may even qualify for a historical plaque. Literally! The place, like it's strippers, is old!
Okay, so I hope you enjoyed that.
-P
PS: no more movie trivia. You people suck at it! Or at least I suspect you would if you tried to answer the questions. Which leads me to believe you don't give a damn about quality movies. I pity you.  | | |
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